So, I'm supposed to be out doing Christmas shopping, but I haven't got ready to go yet. SO, I decided that while I'm still not ready I might as well procrastinate a little more to make this post..it's a bit lengthy so I apologize in advance.
Disclaimer: We're all adults, but I'll still let you know that this a female post. So, if you're cool with reading about my periods and lady stuff and such, then read on. lol
I mentioned Saturday, I believe, about a life-changing decision I was going to have to make that was bothering me. Well, now that I have talked to my hubs and talked to my best friend I feel like I can talk about it here now.
Hubs and I have been together for 9 & 1/2 yrs (actually on the 9th it will be exactly 9 & 1/2 yrs.) A couple of years ago...I think about 3 years ago, I decided to come off of my birth control. We were not TRYING to get pregnant, but we were at a place where we were okay if it happened.
SO, fast forward to a year after being taken off...My gyno wondered why I hadn't become pregnant yet. There were a couple of factors that played into it. One being the medication that Doug was on. We got that changed by his doctor and everything was hunky dory again.
Well, fast forward another year later (July 2011) after being taken off of BC & my gyno was still questioning why I hadn't become pregnant & to add to that me periods had become sporadic...again. (That was the main reason I was put on birth control as a teen, if I remember correctly.) The topic then turned to, "are you wanting to try or no?"...well my answer to that was not a flat out no, but I also wasn't ready to say YES I want to TRY. I wanted to still be at a place where what happens, happens.
3 months later (October 2011) I ended up having to go back to him because my sporadic period turned into a constant period. Not even exaggerating. I went for a good couple of months with a continuous period, everything from spotting to a flow. He gave me a prenatal vitamin prescription & tried me on progesterone. It evened me out for the short time I took it. I didn't do any of the refills though. Well 2012 hit & the first couple of months were kind of fine, and then my period went haywire again for a good month & 1/2, but instead of running back to him I just let it play out. It finally kind of "evened out" into what I kind of accepted as MY new normal (when it came to my pd anyway) and was doing about 2 weeks on- 2 weeks off, or 1 week on -2 weeks off.
Anyway...fast forward to time for my yearly...I knew I was supposed to schedule and appt for Oct. but I didn't.
At the beginning of October I went to the doctor (primary care dr.) to have some blood work done. She checked my Cholesterol, Trigs, blood count, electrolytes, liver function, kidney function, and thyroid function. I wanted to wait for those results before I went to my gyn. Those result came back, everything was within the normal levels (there are a few numbers that could be higher or lower for my own piece of mind, but I'm within the ranges I need to be in and that makes me happy.). Well, instead of calling to make my appt. right away I stalled. Not 100% sure why, I guess it's because I KNEW what our conversation was going to consist of and I wasn't quite ready for it.
Finally one day last week my mom asked me if I had called, I said, "no, I sure haven't." She said, "well do you need me to?" I jokingly said, "If it will make you not ask me about it again." lol...well she didn't, but I did to make her happy. And to my
Friday comes, I fasted for my appt..I wasn't told to but I knew I was going to have bloodwork and I didn't know if I would need to fast or not for it, so I did anyway...better safe than sorry I suppose.
Well, of course the topic was periods and babies. For the past couple of months, surprisingly (pleasantly surprisingly) to me, my period has been normal. Once a month, ahhmazing. lol So, I did tell him that, but of course 2 months of normalcy compared to 2-3 years of randomness isn't a whole lot. The conclusion he had, which was something that we touched on last year -2011-, was that I am not ovulating every month. Which would make sense, because I barely have cramps or major discomfort during my times. I asked him about PCOS, which he said is pretty much in the ball field of what my problem is. He said it's common for women to go through some troubles, which I believe. He said he would do bloodwork to check some other hormones, but we discussed doing a few round of treatment to start out with. So, boom, just like that I am on my first fertility treatment.
It bothered me. I have many fears and doubts. My amazing best friend talked with me through them yesterday. My husband has listened to me express them & talked with me about them. So I feel better, but they are still there. I'm not going to get DEEP into them in this post, I may save that for it's own post. Anyway, Friday when I left, instead of a happy "Yay, I'm finally getting the ball rolling." I had the complete opposite reaction. I actually went home and pretty much cried all evening. Again, if I do another post with all my reservations, you'll know why.
So...ask he and I discussed...he gave me another prenatal prescription because mine was about to expire (which I had stopped taking it anyway), and he gave me another round of progesterone & then the ovulation meds.
My instructions: take to progesterone to give me a period, then track from day 1 of it, when I start. On day 5 is when I take the medicine that is supposed to make me ovulate, I take it from day 5 to day 9. On or around day 14 I should ovulate. So he told me to buy those over the counter ovulation tests and start checking on days 13-15 or 16. And then of course for hubs and I to
WELL...come the next day, Saturday (12-1), my body decides, "you know what, you don't need progesterone, here have some spotting"...and just like that-- Day 1. Which means DUN-DUN-DUN today is Day 5.
After a few days of freaking out about it. I decided I'm going to try. So, today will be my first day of taking Clomid. It's also the first day of many changes for hubs & I both. I told him if I do this then he is going to get healthy with me, which for both of us really means losing weight and watching our portions. And he agreed.
So, welcome to my journey into trying to become a mom, I guess would be an okay way of wording it. lol
I'm going to try to blog about this, as I think it will be a good way to process my thoughts. So, I hope you guys don't mind & are willing to hang around. :)
Anyone else in the midst of this or have gone through, or about to start going through this?
Well, I need to go, I've got some errands to run and shopping that needs to be done. (bleh).
Hope my post made sense, my mind is still a little jumbled with all of it.
Have a great Wednesday all!
♥♥♥
Read this whole entire thing! It made sense, so no worries! lol!
ReplyDeleteI love that you are being so open with your readers.
I love your courage and hope that this will work out for you.
Cheering you on, girl! =)
Thank you so much, Karla!
DeleteIt really means a lot!
♥