Life lately. Rambles & such (in case you weren't interested in reading about 1D)

So, in the past week (or so) I've been in and out of blogland.

Because life has been happening.

And I'm okay with that.

BUT I HAVE MISSED Y'ALL!

I've done my typical creeping/reading.

But not a lot of commenting, or posting, obviously.

So, lately..

The first weekend of Summer was pretty top notch for me.

Friday was the concert, and then Saturday was just a chill day. Doug let me sleep in (til 3pm) & then we spent the day doing nothing! Sunday we got a grocery list together and headed out to spend way too much money get food for the week. And we had an amazing supper Sunday night. If you follow me on IG you've seen a lot of food lately. Sorry bout that. ;-) 

Friday night, after the concert, we stopped at Taco Bell once we got closer to home & while ordering I heard a funky ass noise that my car was making. Thankfully, we all made it home safely. The next day my mechanic hubby tore it down and figured out what it was. But I ended up having to spend the week car-less (unless I drove my dad's truck). So it's finally fixed & I got to drive her today! 

I've been so tired this week with having to make sure broseph wake up for work, and I've been sleeping in the recliner. THE RECLINER. Why? Because if I go to bed after he leaves for work, I sleep ALL. DAY. So, the recliner was the way to go. 

But, my back hurts. I'm SO happy to go to bed in my bed tonight.

I've cooked every single night since Sunday.

Done dishes most days/nights.

Cleaned..a little...not as much as I'd like, but whatevs.

I think I do fairly well at running a house.

My bro also handed his finances over to me & it stressed me out once I figured up how much he has going out per month as opposed to what he has coming in. I'm really hoping him not having quick access to his money will help him save. He's just going to have to accept it when I tell him no sometimes & he's just going to have to really be smart with spending & loafing.

I've also had a hold on Hubby loves card too, so we can try to tighten up. But, it hasn't really worked, yet.  We got so low that it'll take a couple of weeks to see in build back up to our, or my, comfort zone. For instance, right now, we are about 4 days late paying our cell bill, & won't be able to pay it til tomorrow. Yeah, too low for this girl! So, I forsee a lot of home fun. I'm still hoping that we can get a lot of that summer bucket list done, though.

We'll see.

And then of course, job hunting. I spent hours upon hours yesterday looking at job listings.

I found one that I felt comfortable applying for. So I did & then I woke up to an email that read, in part, "we're sorry to inform you that you have not been selected to interview," I'm so tired of getting that email.

I feel hopeless. No one seems to want anyone with no experience...even the jobs that say "will train the right person". Are you fuckin' kidding me? So today, while I was at the mall having my rings cleaned & grabbed a paper of who all is hiring there. So, I'll read over that and see if there is anything I want to try for.

I don't want to be in retail. And I don't want to be in the health field. I honestly don't know where I would really do well. I don't know where I belong.

I seriously feel lost when it comes to the career aspect of my life.

It just...ugh.

Frustration isn't even the right word for it.

 

July is knockin' on the door! It's My Birthday Month! My B-day is in 13 days y'all. :-) Which means I have 13 days to get my 30 Before 30 list made. I should probably get started on that, huh?

I love summer, but it's not my favorite. It's too hot, I don't like being miserable.

I don't like sweating, I sweat too much anyways, so summer is hell for me.

Well, I figured I'd drop in and ramble.

Let you know I'm still here.

& I'll be back.

I gotta go finish up supper now.

TGIF & Have a great weekend.

 

Lovins & stuff!

♥♥♥

Brandy

We're engaged...finally!

So, as of Dec.25,2009 I was a soon-to-be-Mrs.

Dec. '09

As I said in the last post, by this point we had been together for 6 and 1/2 years.
It was really one of those "it's about time!" things.
I was so excited! We had tossed around the idea of getting engaged, on a serious note, for a while.
And it was so weird that this guy that I had called my boyfriend for 6.5 years was now my fiance.

And then came all the questions about when was the wedding?
We need to hurry and get to planning.
Some people actually thought that we would go ahead and get married that summer after becoming engaged. (summer '10) since we had already been together for so long.
But no, I didn't want to rush planning. I did want a proper wedding. I didn't to be forced to pick a date, or anything like that.
So, my answer to everything was basically, "we haven't decided yet."

As I also said in the last post, we had been going through a bit of a rough patch not long before becoming engaged. Things were obviously better, but there was still a lot of work to be done on us.
It takes time.
We were engaged in total for a year and a half.
We spent that year continuing to work on ourselves while beginning the fun and super stressful task of wedding planning while also being about to have fun.

There had also been an unexpected tragedy in his family so we had to really step up and be there for his mom and little brother.
We ended up basically moving in with the two of them for the about 2 or 3 months.
There was a lot going on.

 But we still managed to focus on getting back to where we really wanted, and needed to be.
And we did.

One of our Engagement pictures. AG Photography

 

2010 rounded out with an engagement shoot, a nice family vacation, and more fun.

 

Then it rolled over to 2011 and continued & the countdown to the wedding was on!

This is one of those short and sweet type posts I mentioned. I'll get into the planning in the next post....

♥♥♥
B

My Boyfriend.

Read Chapter 1 here.

So, in the beginning of June, we had established that we were bf/gf.
Summertime was typical summertime, lots of hanging out.

July '03

He would hang out in my room more.
He stayed the night more...in my room.
We grew closer.
I still remember when he said I Love You, when we first kissed...aaannnd when we first...well....
It was all in about the first month of us being bf/gf.
He very quickly became a little more...permanent at my house. He was there all the time. During the day. Overnight. Within a month or so he had essentially moved it. I turned 15 in July.
I know you're thinking, "what, you were 15, he was 18 & he lived with you?"
Well,...simply put, yes.
Everything was going good.
In July, I went to Florida for a week as I had done before, to spend the week with my best friend & it was so cute when I got back I came home. This boy had gotten me a dozen roses and a note. (The only time he's even gotten flowers for me-lol).
He was getting ready to go away to college. To Wyoming. He was initially going to leave in September, but changed it to end of Dec./beginning of Jan.

Nov.'03

I still didn't fully meet his mom, step dad and baby bro until a few months into the relationship. His mom was very unsure about our relationship in the first couple of months since he had turned 18 & I was 15. There was the whole "underage" issue and all, but she still accepted it. And then by the time December came around we had been together for a little over 6 months & I remember having to say goodbye to him not long after Christmas, (it might have even been in like the first week of January.)
I was devastated. My boyfriend just moved to freakin' Wyoming, to go to college. We had decided that we were going to try this long distance thing & see if we could pull through. If I'm being honest, I really didn't see it fully working out. Let's face it. I was a 10th grader & he was about to start college and we were basically on opposite sides of the country now. But we didn't want to break up.
Well,...about a week into him being there, it was time for him to actually start school.
He didn't even finish his first day. His mom called to my school, had someone from the front office call me out of class to talk to her on the phone. She told me a few details & told me to call Doug. So I hung up with her & called to talk to him.
His anxiety got the best of him, he was homesick, didn't want to be there, etc, etc. Everything just kind of hit him at once. And when it came down to it, it just wasn't for him. So it was either by that night or the next day his mom and I were on a plane to Denver.

If I'm not mistaking, I think...this is a small part of the Rockies (obviously, not the big parts, haha)

Now, I'm a puss when it comes to flying. I always said I would never, ever fly. EVER. EVERRRR. And yet here I was agreeing to go with my b/f's mom to Denver, Colorado to get him. We landed in Denver & then drove up to the CO/WY line to meet him & then we all drove home. And just like that...3-4 days later we were back home.
A couple of months later he landed a job at a car dealership.

 
Everything was going good.

June '04

June '04 Vacation

June 2004 marked 1 year & I was even invited to go on vacation with his family.

And then we added another year,
and another, and another, etc, etc.
We had been through ups and down. Been there for each other in bad times, sad times, happy times and all.
We went through many times when I was sure we'd break up. I'm a difficult one to deal with and he can also be hard to handle.
But, I don't know, we just worked so well.
I graduated in '06 & turned 18. Age was no longer and issue, not that we cared anyway. We hit our 3 year mark a few weeks after I graduated.
We started getting a little more serious. We moved from upstairs at my house, to the basement. We had a dog and eventually got a cat. (lol, that sounds dumb saying it or typing it, but that can be a big deal for some.)
Over the next couple of years we tossed around marriage, kids, jobs/school (mainly for me), etc etc. Typical "adult" type stuff, even though I was only 18-19-20, it was still something on my mind. I had always been okay with being a mom that young. I kind of got baby fever early in life... But I needed to try to get back into school or find a job.
We were a typical couple. We had some pretty rough arguments, but we also had some very special times.
We basically "grew up" together, and that came with a bunch of trials. We grew stronger together.
In many ways we grew up faster than most people our ages, which is what presented a lot of our problems. It can be difficult transitioning from teen to young adult anyway, add on a serious relationship & it can sometimes speed it up a bit.

'07

'08

Fast forward ahead to about 2008. We had been going through a rough period due to outside influences. It had been an up and down battle & It came to a point where I had to give him an ultimatum. It came down to "it's me or that". Well, he chose me.
I'm not going to get too much into that right now. But it all came to a peak in October of '08. It was a huge eye opener to him I think & he realized how he looked & learned real quick that I wasn't playing games. Over the next year or so it took a lot of adjusting. I've always been willing to work with him. It didn't come easy, but we had been together for 5 going on 6 years and been through too much for me to just give up without trying at all.

Brings us to the end of 2009 and on Christmas Day. We always spend the night at his moms on Christmas Eve so we can open gifts with them on Christmas morning.
So that morning I got one gift from Doug.
I pulled a little box out of a little bag on Christmas morning & he looked at me and just simply said "Will You?"
So romantic, right? ;-)
After 6 1/2 years together, we were finally engaged!
I know I have a couple of pictures from that morning...just don't know where. lol 

Just Engaged! Christmas Evening '09

♥
B

What's My Age Again?

Is it even relevant?

(yes, it is..in some cases)

But, I mean, really?

Back in December, right before Christmas, I was Christmas shopping with my mother in law &

I saw this sign. I should have bought it, but didn't.

I loved it. I stood there and stared at it for a few minutes. I even looked at the price.

I'm actaully tempted to make the trip back down to Cumming to see if it's still there.

Which I doubt.

But I would love to have it in my house.

I'm going to sound like a major hypocrite with this post,

because I am definitely one to look at someone and say (or think)

"How old are you?" or "Why don't you try acting your age?"

Some people just take it wayyy overboard and you really do just have to look at them and wonder

"How fucking old are you?!"

Because, a lot of the time, people do choose inappropriate times to turn into a kid.

Or to turn into a baby (if they're already a kid).

Now back to my first point.

I'm 24.

But I act a whole variety of ages.

I'm not joking...

It depends on the day!

Sometimes,

I'm a whiny baby.

Sometimes,

I'm more mature than my momma.

Sometimes,

I'm a 14 year old girl who gets giddy at the sight of a cute boy.

(let's be clear here, this only pertains to celebs/musician. I am married, ya know.)

Sometimes,

I'm a punky, "rebel" of whatever the hell age I want to be.

Sometimes,

I'm a wise old owl...

okay...so that's an animal..uhh...you get my point.

Sometimes,

I'm the voice of reason.

Sometimes,

I'm the person who needs the voice of reason.

Sometimes,

I'm achy, and run down.

Sometimes,

I have more energy than I have sense.

Sometimes,

I'm a hormonal emo teen/young adult who hates the world and everyone in it.

(aw, hell, adults are like that too)

Sometimes,

I'm a normal twenty-something year old who is just going about her day.

(My normal that is, which is far different from everyone elses)

But the one constant in all of that,

is that I am always

Me.

No, I will not grow up!

No, I will not "act" my age.

No, I will not stop making jokes.

No, I will not stop giggling.

No, I will not stop playing kid games.

No, I will not stop farting and laughing at it.

No, I will not always suck it up when something doesn't go my way.

No, I will not stop dreaming, ever.

No, I will not let life knock me down. (or I'll try not to anyway)

I'm not saying to always throw caution to the wind and act like a total D-bag. Or throw a fit in the middle of Walmart, or Target, or wherever your drug of choice may be. Or to be totally immature just 'cause you can.

I'm saying, common sense, if you possess it, kinda tells you how you should act; and a good upbringing is a major contributor to that.

What I'm saying is, some times/days it's okay to not act like that! 

It's in the timing.

I you don't heed any of what I'm saying an apply it to yourself, apply it to other people.

I'm mainly referring to adults with this.

(because let's face it, when you have an almost 10 year old acting like a 4 year old...just, no. Stop it. Act right because that shit isn't cute.)

So,

Say you're at a concert & there are a group of people hootin' and hollerin'. More than likely it's just innocent fun. Well, instead of turning your nose up at it, smile/laugh & hell holler with 'em!

Or if you're at the aquarium waiting on the dophin show to start & a group of people start doing the wave in the audience, don't sit like a knot on a log when it gets to you. You get off you heiny-ho and ride that wave!

Or say your husband is acting like a kid. Let him, for about 5 minutes & then you can whip his ass back into shape..

lol, okay I was kidding with that one!

It's perfectly okay to have fun, within reason.

Growing up doesn't always have to be a ba-hum-bug thing.

If you like to snob around and act your age and never laugh and well whatever else it is that you do.

That's awesome for you. I applaud you...a little bit...lol

But don't walk around thinking that everyone else is going to have a stick shoved up their ass too.

I know I definitely won't, that's a one-way street, exit only.

I'm serious when it's needed. I know how I'm supposed to act.

And when I need to, or am expected to, I usually do act right.

But if I know I don't have to act that way or any certain way, I probably won't.

So,

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

For me, it really does depend on the day.

Which is why when you're reading my Sissy Fits, one day you'll see me talk about having a baby and next I may talk about how fudgicles (fudgesicles) look like frozen poop.

(If you don't know what that line is from, then you're crazy, j/k ask & I'll show you.)

 

I don't wanna grow up! ;)

And because I am forever obsessed with music, I'm leaving you with this gem.

Because it inspired my title, & who doesn't love it?! 

Lovins!

 ♥♥♥

Brandy