Friday, March 29, 2013

My no baby rambles.

Having a baby brings on a lot of fears in most women.
For me.
It's almost everything- haha.
I over think things way too much.
But the big ones are the worst.

I feel like when you are trying to conceive your first child in a somewhat planned out manner it gives you a lot of time to think of things.
To think out different scenarios.
My messed up brain? It thinks of the bad.

What if there is something wrong with my body?
What if there is something wrong & I don't find out until after I get pregnant?
After conception...
What if something is wrong or ends up being wrong with my baby?
What if something happens to it?
What if something happens to me?

I feel like it's no secret by now that I'm petrified of death.
I'm scared shitless to give birth. Not going to lie AT ALL.
I'm scared of something going wrong...with me and/or baby.

These, among many others, are things that you decide to deal with and risk when going into starting a family.
And as much as I am wanting that family.
I'm wanting the pitter patter of little brats.
I'm also not completely wanting to deal with any negativity.

Sounds selfish, right?
I can't help it though.

I know God wouldn't give you something you couldn't handle.
But I question that at the same time.
He may think I'm stronger than I do.
I don't do well with a lot of pressure.
I feel like he knows that.

That's another reason I keep trying to tell myself that it's all in His timing.
I've even started praying on it again.

But Dear God, as much as I know it's your timing. I don't want to wait too many more years before I stop trying. I'm talking next year or so. So all I'm saying is, give me some kind of sign. Either it's gonna happen or not. If not, I'd like to know sooner than later so I can move on with my life in the proper direction.

Not knocking annnyyone waiting to get preggers in their late 20's. But me, personally, I have always wanted to be a young mom. Meaning I want a baby like 3 years ago... And Doug does too.

I haven't written about it in a while, because I've been trying doing what everyone on the freaking universe thinks I should do...not thinking about it.
I appreciate that advice from every, I really do, because I know that exactly what I should do. Not think about, not dwell on it, not worry about it.
However, when a couple is's way--wayyy-- harder to not think about it. Because, well, we're trying. You have to freakin keep up with your period/ovulation for God sakes, how the shit am I really supposed to NOT think about it.

Let me give you a little insight. From my personal experience anyway.
When my period comes, I'm bummed, not because I'm bleeding, but because I know what it likely means. The fact that mine is irregular, sucks so much more.
When my period doesn't come ("on time"-when it's normal-), I get a little excited while telling myself not to get excited.-Because after all,  it's probably just back to it's irregular self-
Having sex? More than likely it's on my mind. If by wonderful chance it's not, chances are it was beforehand & probably will be afterward.
Out to eat; want a margarita? No I probably shouldn't.
Crazy methods? Handstand after sex anyone (okay that's a total exaggeration, lol. But you get my point. It is a funny visual though)
Thinking about/planning working out and eating healthy. Oh you want to get in shape for summer? No I want to get healthy so I can grow a healthy human.

I really, really do try not to think about it a lot. Unfortunately that comes with not taking my prenatals, not tracking my period or checking my ovulation.
But, I've finally started having a few drinks a little more often. I promise I don't do handstands post-bang session. Lately I've gotten better about keeping my mind on other things.
And I really do enjoy everything about not having a kid right now. (which is another bit of advice I always get-and appreciate-).
But it's still there.
And it'll stay there.

I WILL make my follow up appointment next week.
The one I was supposed to make for the second week of JANUARY.
And then maybe I'll have an actual update of sorts instead of just rambles.
I don't even know if this post made a lot of sense & I'm not reading back through to find out.


Thursday, March 28, 2013

Here lately...

I've just been going through the motions of the day....most days.
Including but not limited to:
Losing "friends"
Pissing people off
trying to not become a basket case
etc etc.

And, I'm tired.
It's exhausting trying to not being a complete and total bitch.
I feel like my mind stays so jumbled as is, but it's always so much worse when I've got unnecessary things bearing weight on it.

And to top it off, I have until Saturday to take a self review to keep my Certification active.
I have to pay $50 to take this test...and I will probably fail.
Just like I did on the last one.
Sometimes I wonder how I even passed in the first place.

I haven't gotten a call back -yet- about that job, so I'm just gonna assume it's been filled.
It would have been perfect though, part time.
But, I applied for another job too so, fingers crossed.
I feel like I'm gonna end up having to hit up the outlet mall & see who's hiring.
Not that THAT will do me any good.

I started reading The Happiness Project the other night.
I'm only on March, (haven't started it yet).
I literally fell asleep 10 minutes after I started reading it the other day.
That is NOT saying anything about the book,
That is about me. lol Reading sometimes relaxes me TOO much.
Alas, I woke back up & continued reading through the Intro, Jan. & Feb.
I have to say I'm loving it so far.
I almost want to sit down with a highlighter & start over so highlight some of the things she says.
You read and you're just like..."yes!"
I can't wait to continue it.

I'd really like to get out and take pictures.
I still haven't really dove into my camera yet.
And this is what I was afraid of.

Just lots on my mind.
I've already said it once, I've gotta sort my thoughts out.
The house will be less crowded this weekend,
so I'm hoping that will allow me to not feel so uptight.

I also need to find my "topic list" for here.
Before I started my blog I had a list of things to write about.
I need to find it again for those days that I want to post, but
don't really have anything to update or write about.

 .....rambling over.


Wednesday, March 27, 2013

I can't believe & A Fool to Guide You

I can't believe... everyone believes your bullshit. You're a parasite in everyone's ears, or to their eyes.
I can't believe... I let you get to me that much.
I can't believe... that I have been awake since 10-something & haven't eaten anything yet. ugh, I'm STARVING RIGHT NOW!
I can't believe... I still haven't mailed off my God Son's birthday gift. I suck at mailing things sometimes.
I can't believe... that there are so many fun and exciting things that I would really love to pile on my list, but can't. >.<
I can't believe... how freaking obsessed I became with FOB's new song(s). I swear YouTube got mad at me yesterday for listening to one over-and over- and over- and over...etc.
I can't believe... that I've probably ate half a bag of reeses eggs, alone.
I can't believe... the way my mind works.
I can't believe... that I'm still trying to find a job without connections and no one is willing to give me a chance.
I can't believe... I've let so much build up in me again. That's the point of my blog, to let it out.
I can't believe... that we had about 2 days of blowing snow. No accumulating or sticking. Just..snowing. Happy to see the sun again, will be happier to feel the warmer temps again.
I can't believe... I have like 3 days to take a self review test to keep my certification active.
I can't believe... that I'll have to pay $50 for said test, only to probably fail it like I did the last one. SHIT!

You should probably link up with Robin. I know you'll love her! I do!

And because I have bloggy friends/readers that read.
I'm going to give another Florida friend of mine a shoutout.
My friend Drew-who I met through Framing Hanley, has written his first book, and with a fundraiser was able to raise funds to have it published. I, among many others, pledged to help, because I had faith in his ability to put out a good book. And if I can support a friend, I will.
After a lot of hooplah with one publishing company, he finally found another to work with and everything has taken off.
It's in the final stages of being done & is now on sale on Amazon & Westbow's website!
I have already read it, since I was one of the supporters in his fundraiser.
I love it.
It's a supernatural type story. But also has a virtuous undertone.
About a married couple, attempting to save their damaged marriage, taking a weekend retreat with their son in tow. While their, the the demons of the husbands past mixed with dark forces in the night try to unravel what's left of their marriage, all the while they use their faith in and love for one another to fight off the darkness. But will it be enough?
You just have to read it. I loved it.
It's called "A Fool To Guide You".
You can go HERE & HERE to read the description & purchase it in either paperback or hardback.
At least read the description, he obviously tells about it better than I can. haha.

Thanks, lovelies!

My Best Frenemy

You & Me.
Best Friends, we'll be.
Uplifting and fun.
Through smiles and laughter,
Tears and heartache,
Tragedy and triumph.
Friends 'til the end,
Is how it began.
Though now it seems,
My worst enemy
Became the one
I never expected
It to be.
Now good times
And bickering.
Supporting and one-upping.
Down a slippery slope,
Where "Best Friends" became a joke.
Buried beneath
The anger and sarcasm
Lies the best of friends
Who still care.
But on the surface,
It is as it seems;
We've become Best Frenemies.
Love and malice
For one another.
Lead us to discover;
Even the best of friends
Can be broken.
But when the bad
Outweighs the good
Beyond the point of repair.
It's best to part ways, separate;
Let it be.
Only time will tell if wounds will heal.
Best Friends we said we'd always be.
But on the surface,
You and Me.
We became
Best Frenemies.


Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Finish the...

Because I have nothing to really write about right now....I'm linking up with Holly and her bloggy friend Jake for a fun finish the sentence link up! 
I was gonna do this last week,...but I just didn't. I know, I suck.
Here it goes..

1. If calories didn't count, I would eat... wait...calories count? ;) I'm bad with calories because I still eat whatever I want. haha.

2. On my Prom night.... I wore a green, glittery dress. My then-bf (now-hubs) didn't dance. A group of us sat outside & talked the entire time, went inside when King/Queen announcement was happening. Got our pictures taken & that was it! Then we -D & I & one other guy- proceeded to a hotel to meet some other friends to get drunk...I was the only one still in school so it was "my" after prom party. lol

3. When I go to the store, I always buy... something I don't need that causes me to spend way too much money. (Looking at you WalMart, you damn moneytrap!) And a Mountain Dew.

4. Family functions typically... are very loud & involve lots of laughter.

5. I think my blog readers... are awesome & I'm thankful for them. Don't be shy. Let's be friiieeeennnds!

6. I'd much rather be..... in my own home with my hubby.
7. I have an obsession with....the color blue, music, pictures (looking at and taking), social media at times, my TV shows, laughing, and this guy...
And this song, at the moment..
Thank Jesus Fall Out Boy has returned.♥

8. My work friends.... don't have those, unfortunately.

9. When I created my Facebook account.... I only did it because MySpace was losing steam. lol

10. My least favorite word is... no...but really, I don't know. I know there are words I don't like, but I can't think of any...
11. I really don't remember.... what words are my least favorite. Haha! or...what I'm supposed to be doing half the time. Or my passwords half the time. (I'll type it in 10 times before I get the right one), but I can remember random stuff.

12. Justin Bieber.... gave me the fever, Bieber Fever. But Biebs, dude...get it together. Always loved how you seemed so humbled...don't lose that! Dammit! 


Anyone have a Twitter?
Tell me your Twitter handle!

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Ready for a new week.

Last week wasn't terrible. Just a bump in the road.
The attack of the Drama Llama, you know...typical catty bitch stuff.
I've done pretty well at holding my far.
However, my poor cousin & hubs have heard my few rants.
And any of you that read it.
The week ended great, though.
Great moods on Friday & yesterday I got to see my niece! I hadn't seen her since Christmas. She makes my world go round. I love her so much.
The 5 of us ladies -Me, her mom, her, my mom, and my granny- went shopping at the Outlet Mall and then spent a little time at home & then they headed home.
I hope I get to see her again soon.
While shopping, I had a small, minute panic attack (okay not really) because I went to go to Rue 21...and it was gone! Then I realized they just moved it. Got to the new location, & it's BIGGER! & Also having a great grand opening sale. I didn't buy anything but I did try stuff this..
I WILL be going back to get both pairs of jeans & that shirt.
Also, those black jeans....are a size bigger -ick- than what I wear, but they are "super skinny" jeans so therefore, they are tiiight! I want them REAL bad, but my busted can o' biscuits (aka muffin top x's 100) just chills out, way out. SO,..I'm thinking of getting them as a part of a "motivational outfit." I will HAVE to workout to fit in them comfortably. & The blue ones are a bit tight too, so it'd be the same for those.
Either way...I kinda love them.
So, yea. We'll be going back for me to get some new stuff & to get hubby love some new shorts!
After all the shopping fun & after they left, hubs & I went to see his mom & then made a quick run to Walmart & back home.
I bought the movie "This Is 40". It was pretty good. Doug fell asleep on me, per usual. See, he makes the mistake of thinking he can lay down to watch movies with me...naw..don't work too well. Haha.
It's okay though.
I don't have much to say today. I have lots on my mind & plenty to get out, but I need to sort it all first.
So, I'll link up with Neely & Ashley and do a Sunday Social! ♥

1. What is your favorite thing about Spring?
The main thing is that the weather is warmer! And then anything that comes with the warmer weather. :)

2. Favorite kind of flowers to grow or receive?
Roses, pansies, bleeding hearts...

3. What is your favorite nail polish color?
I don't paint my nails that often, so I don't really have a favorite...if I had to pick, probably a shade of blue. Or white...?

4. What is your favorite out door activity?
Cookouts & bonfires! Walking. Concerts. Sitting around and talking. Sports...

5. Do you have any fun Spring plans? Details.
As far as events: we have a concert at Sanford Stadium (Jason Aldean, Luke Bryan, Jake Owen & Thomas Rhett) Go Dawgs!
And then I'm taking a weekender trip to Savannah to meet up with my right lung (my best of the bestest).
And I think that's all of the set in stone plans we have so far...
Our anniversary & Hubs b-day is in June, but we have no plans for either...yet.
And I know we wanna start that can count as plans, lol.
And of course throw in some cookouts. Etc, etc.

Gonna leave off with this...
My Sugar sleeps like this sometimes...She cray!
& this...
Best invention ever made...for my dog! lol This is our dog, Spud...he's nutso...

Happy Sunday!

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

A little venting, I Can't Believe...and a singing parrot. Happy Spring!

I'm sitting here, eating my popcorn, easy cheese, chicken in a biscuit cracker snack, chugging a mt.dew & wasting time instead of going to put in the application that I was going to put in today.
Not, I'm pretty disappointed in myself for not going to put that app in. I shall do it tomorrow...says the girl who has been saying that for over a week. It'll end up being the typical case of me waiting too long--or just not getting chosen.
So, I have been wanting to go see my favorites (Framing Hanley) & had my hubbers talked into going on an overnight stay 4 hrs away to see 'em. He was game. I asked if he wanted me to invite someone else so he would have company while I was in the middle of the crowd enjoying the show, he said sure.
I had invited someone already but we hadn't talked about it in a week or 2. Last night on a whim, while it was on my mind, I decided to ask again. Only I did it via FB...& my ex-bff(?) flipped. her. shit.
So nice of her to dedicate a status on FB about me..
 that included these comments, among others.
Yes, sweetheart I know how I am.
It was all posted last night, but I didn't notice until today when I was scrolling through FB. And of course it has accumulated many comments.
There was a status, 2 posts made to 2 diff mutual friends that I'm taking as slight digs at me, followed by an Ecard post & a song (Beyonce- Irreplaceable..that one--I'm not sure if it's about me, lmao).
I can say that I get it. It's not like I'm all "*gasp* how dare she, she had no reason to say that."
However, seeing things on FB don't mean a lot.
As Karma would have it for me, about 3 or 4 hours after all of this junk was posted. Nixon (the lead singer) told me that that show had actually been canceled.
Why Karma? Because this is the friend that I had the falling out with last year...and the "straw that broke the camels back" was about the exact. same. thing. A Framing Hanley show.
Replay, much?
We've both been bad friends. But I decided last year that I wasn't going to let any bickering consume me like I normally would...resulting in me looking like even more of a bitch than I am...& I am a bitch. So yea, I look like a terrible friend. Which is a little bit true...but only to her.
Bitch, much? Told you.
Anyway, since I saw all of this I have tried to not let it bother me & in order to do that I gotta get it out.
So sorry to subject you guys to the Drama Llama.
I'll not "feed" her right now. I'm gonna wait and see if she tries to take anymore indirect digs.

Onto a new link up with someone who is sure to brighten your day! I just love the little ray o' sunshine that is Robin & you'll love her too! Go link up (click on the pic!)

I can't believe...that I wasted that much energy typing about that ridiculousness.
I can't believe...that I FINALLY get to see My Girl this weekend. (My niece who I haven't seen since Christmas...I'm so excited!)
I can't believe...that I get to have a girls weekend with my best of the best in about a month!
I can't's already Mid-March. On one hand it's like, "it's just March.." on the other it's like, "Is APRIL really only 2 weeks away?! WHAT?"
I can't believe...I still haven't made my follow up appt. with my gyno.
I can't supper last night was a large order of fries from McDonald's, a mountain dew, & A white chocolate chip macadamia nut cookie.
I can't's not butter!

Lol, my mind went blank!
Hope everyone had been having a great FIRST DAY OF SPRING! :)
 yayyy one of my favorite seasons!


I'll leave you with this.
Parrot singing "Bodies" by Drowning Pool

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin'...

Linkup with Nicole & let's have some girl talk.
It's harmless, you can be as open or as discrete as you'd like.

 This weeks question:
Do you prefer wining and dining (foreplay) or do 
you like to get right to it? Explain each...
for example- wining and dining: kissing more intimately at a party to 
set the mood... etc.
Interpret this question however you see fit ;)
I like wining and dining. I'm can be revved up already & getting to right down to business can be absolutely no issue.
But touchin', rubbin', kissin', etc... I likes.
When he makes me want it even more than I already do.
Yes, please!
Now it's your turn.
Are you brave enough to be a little naughty?
 Go link up! & You can see the question for next week also!

It's da brat-tat-tat bustin' out on that ass.

So, first lemme start with...I don't like Bloglovin. It confuses me, & I can't change my picture yet because I refuse to have it connected to my FB account. They said that they would eventually have it fixed to where we could change our pictures in other ways. So for now, I'm still rocking that blue heart. I don't know how to post from it. Is it just for reading?! Or have I just not figured it all out yet?! I'm set up on it and all, but I'll probably continue to use my Blogger dashboard until (1)I figure it out, or (2)until it won't let me...whichever comes first. You can still Follow me on Bloglovin' though, if you haven't already. :)

Today is Naughty Talk Tuesday. Link up with Nicole! It's a link about sexy time. I'll post mine separate from this post.

Now, I'm gonna have a bit of a selfish moment.
Don't hate on me for it.

I wish people around me would think like me.

For example, pictures.
It's rare that there is someone else that likes to capture everything in pictures, besides me. It's not that it never happens. But when I want it to, it seems like it doesn't. Let me elaborate a little. You're on an outing with lets say some friends. & you (being me) are snapping pictures, it's fun and memorable and junk, ya know? But're not going to be in anyyyy pictures because YOU'RE THE ONE TAKING THEM. & Let's face it, selfies aren't always the way to go. Sometime you'd like to be in a few nice candid shots instead of always being the one taking it. This has been an issue to me for as long as I can remember, because I was always the girl with the camera. One question I always want to ask photographers, because on normal circumstances they are more than likely always the picture taker, is "does it ever bother you that you are in minimal pictures because you're always the one behind the camera?" It's actually funny to me that it bothers me, because I'm rarely satisfied with pictures that I'm IN,..but it's just the simple principal that you can show people pictures of where you've been and who you were with and all the fun & then it's like "well where are you?" Behind the f'kin camera, as always. Not complaining about that part, but it's the fact that no one even offers "oh hey, let me take one now so you can get in on the picture." Oh & when they do, or when you finally ask, they snap a quick shot & then that's it. I actually take the time to try to get a good picture of/for you. Is it really to much to ask to do the same for me. If you look unflattering or something isn't right to me, I'll say "let's do another" Or "let me get a couple more". Them...nah they can't be bothered with that.

Gift giving..
I may be part of the 1% with this, but I usually pay attention when my husband or anyone in my family says "I want [something]" I feel like no one does that for me. I've even become very outspoken at times with saying I WANT THIS. When it comes to Christmas, I STILL make a list. Why? Because if someone asks what do you want, I can give them the list & there's no excuse for "well you never told me what you liked or wanted." Um, no. I have a's about 5 or so pages long and very specific. (I wish that was an exaggeration, but it's not....In my defense, it's not actually a "Christmas list"...when I see something I want at anytime I write it down,...for ME. It just comes in handy when some sort of gift giving holiday comes up....also 85-90% of the list is CD's & Movies I want...again, not an exaggeration. I think I have 5 pages front and back of just movies. lol When I buy myself something, or if I happen to receive it as a gift, it get's marked off, but the list is for me.)

Hubs & I still live at home, my home. We have 5 adults living in this house. No, I'm not kidding. FIVE.
Cleaning can be quite the chore. Everyone is suppose to clean up after themselves, work together, blah blah blah. I can clean, I don't like to but I can....When I get in a cleaning mood, I HATE that I can't clean. Why can't I? I like to be ALONE when I clean. Why? Because I refuse to clean with someone else sitting on their ass. I'm not cleaning around you. I don't even want to clean in the next room. Leave, go visit with someone or something. If you want me to clean, scoot! Huntin' seasons are my best friend because it's the only time I get chances at getting the house alone! Everyone's gone to the club for the weekend. It's leaves me with the option to do whatever the fuck I want to do...& clean. lol

It applies to way more areas of life, theses are just the examples & areas that came to mind right now.
Look, I know how ridiculous I may sound.
But please tell me I'm not completely alone in this?! Haha

Now that I've given the impression that I'm a completely spoiled brat, I'm gonna go sulk in my room...
Okay not really. LOL
I'm gonna do another post & then go clean something downstairs (where I'm alone), or put together my dresser for my bathroom! :)

Have a fantabulous Tuesday.

Sunday, March 17, 2013

Follow me on Bloglovin'!

Love my readers & friends & would love for you to continue to be a part of my journey.
I've signed up and all, now I just have to figure it all out!

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

Happy St. Patty's Day & Lazy Sunday!

Whew! What a weekend!
I'm surprised I'm not more exhausted than I am.
I feel like I've been going, going, going since about Thursday!

We went to see the Harlem Globetrotters last night. I had never been & neither has my nephew or brother in law, & it had been years since hubby has been. I had so much fun. I'm not a basketball fan but I left there telling Doug that I now want to go watch an NBA game. Even though I'm well aware that there are no gags. lol But it was just fun. We all had a lot of fun & enjoyed it!
If you have never been to a Globetrotter game I highly recommend it. Especially if you have kids! They got one signature because it's a mad house trying to get things signed. But they were happy with that!
And we went to Bass Pro Shop before the game since it is 10 minutes, or less, down the road from the venue. Hubby got to spend a couple of gift cards. So he was happy about that. :)
He's gone fishing now & I am sitting her still kind of unwinding from the last 4 or 5 days. Doing absolutely nothingggg that I don't HAVE to do.
I've gotta figure out this bloglovin thing. So I suppose I will do that eventually.
Or play with my camera.
I haven't even really got to play around with it much, I've been so go-go-go.
I may have to use it on my mom. She got a new gun from Daddy as an anniversary gift & she wants a picture with/of it. :)
Random thought: I wish there was a TV in my kitchen so I could watch the race while I'm sittin' at the table.

I'm pretty bummed that my flats are starting to smell. I know that it can be a common thing, but I don't like it. So I've gotta nip that asap. Not okay with my shoes or my feet stinking. Thank God flip flops will be taking over very soon.

I was looking on InstaG last night & KellyAnne had posted pictures from where she and her cute family went to Amicalola Falls and took the hike & saw the falls & it was so pretty...You would think with me living one county away from there my whole life that I wouldn't have taken that hike before. But no. I haven't. Ever. (Or if I have, it was a field trip & I don't remember it.) But for the past 2 or 3 years I've really wanted to. & KellyAnne's pictures made me want to even more! So, when Doug & I start to do all this walking and junk, it will be on the agenda! :) Along with the trail around our reservoir (which I will let you know how that is, KellyAnne!)

I have no major plans for St. Patty's Day, as I've already mentioned. Today= a day of nothingness. I will enjoy some Saint Brendan's tonight though.
Heyyy, let's do Sunday Social today because my mind is so blank right now.
1. Favorite thing to do on a rainy day? 
Lounge/sleep. Watch TV, mess around on the computer.
2. Favorite thing to do on a Summer weekend? 
Just hang out. It really depends on how hot/sunny it is. I don't do well when it gets TOO hot...& I burn easily, haha! But getting out and about it always good!
3. Favorite Spring accessory?
Flip Flops!
4. Favorite way to spend a Winter day?
Basically the same as rainy. Unless it happens to actually snow. Then I go in and out. 
5. What is your favorite season and why? 
Spring, because it is finally starting to get warm and gorgeous, the flowers & everything are blooming & it's just a nice change in scenery. & Fall because it's starting to cool down just a little & who doesn't love fall colors?! Love them both because they are not too hot and not too cold. Perfection!
6. Best birthday you ever had? 
I honestly do not know. I can't answer this one.

The first week of springing forward was great. Like I said, I love it! Getting dark later makes me happy (says the night owl, lol).
Wednesday is the First Day of Spring!
Now I'm gonna go catch up on my blog reading! :)

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Saturday, March 16, 2013

The Happiness Project.

Well, I was going to sit down and post earlier, but my internet had other plans.
I ended up having to push back blogging to get ready for the second part of my day; a gender reveal party. :)
Aww behbies
I didn't post yesterday (Thursday).
Which is okay 'cause I'm posting right now!

The last 2 days have been pretty great. (I have to add that the weather the past few days has also been amazeballs! I actually had to turn on my AC in my car today.)
Made the journey to K Mart (haven't been in a K Mart in a good 10 years), 2 counties away...JUST for a dresser thing to put in my bathroom. BUT, it was on sale & I was going to be able to use gift cards to pay for all of it. In other words--FREE to me. Well worth the drive. ;)
Now we just have to put it together...

Today, I decided to spoil myself.
I finally decided to suck it up and go get my camera.
I came out of the day with a camera, 2 lenses, a carrying case & memory card. 2 shirts, Essie matte top coat, 2 poster frames, & The Happiness Project.

What's even better is I bought the camera, lenses, case, mem. card, Essie, & the book myself, with my money that I've saved for years.
For someone that's unemployed that's a proud thing to be able to say.
Don't get me wrong, I love when my hubs can spoil me, but to be able to say that I bought something I've wanted for so long makes me happy.
[reason 1848290 I need a job]
& I'm pretty excited about reading The Happiness Project. Heard good things about it, so hoping I like it too! I've decided to abandon my current book to read it since it doesn't look like it's that long. Seems like it'll be an easy read. Plus, I feel like for the past year or so I've been trying out my own Happiness Project of sorts....with a few exceptions. So yea, I'm ready to read it!

The gender reveal party was great. So cute. I couldn't be happier for them. It's my hubbies cousin & his wife. But of course I was asked about how things are going with mine & the hubs situation.
& I really had no answers since I STILL haven't been to my follow up appt. (I'm only like 9 weeks late on that follow-up) The only thing I can say is the usual, "I don't know, just hasn't happened yet"..."I try not to think about it"...."I try no to expect it"..."my body sucks"..."I suck because I avoid the dr for no reason"...okay so I didn't say the last 2, but still.
I'm not bothered by being asked that much because they know the situation & are genuinely curious. I'm just bothered by the fact that I can't give them the answer I want to give them. I just need to get my ass back to the Dr. so we can decide what we are going to do next. I know, I know..just do it!

Well, I came home & had a glass of wine, & it is time to unwind and cuddle up & stuff.
Busy day tomorrow!
Bass Pro Shop & The Harlem Globetrotters!
So excited to go see Big Blue (a name for him) at Bass Pro!
I l-o-v-e BPS!
& I'm excited for the Globetrotters too, never seen them before!

OH! I haven't had time to sit down & really do my blog reading in a couple of days, but I've seen a ton of blog titles about everyone switching to bloglovin'?! Idk what that is. & I'm also a bit confused. I log into Blogger & read blogs that way...does that mean I need to switch too?! Like, is that part of Google Reader or whatever?!
Someone help? Please! haha

Hope everyone has a great weekend!
I'll catch up on my reading probably Sunday. :)

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

You can let your hair down...

Today was good. Aside from sleeping wayyy too long.
In my defense, I didn't got to bed until 6am.
Hoping that won't be the case tomorrow.
I've popped some ZzzQuil & I can already feel it.

I had the house to myself once I got up & so I decided I would check my email & junk.
I watched the Pope's ceremony thing.
Then I decided to take advantage of being able to leave without questions.

So I headed off to do a little shopping.
JoAnn's, Michaels, Ulta, & Best Buy.

Got some fabric for a baby blanket I'm making.
A few other pieces for some other projects. 
Stopped into Ulta to see how much the Essie Matte About You top coat costs.

Then I stopped into Best Buy to get a price so I can figure out how much my camera would be.
And well...
I think I can afford it.
Now the next step is convincing myself to actually go get it.
I have to stop questioning myself, doubting myself, etc... 

And then I came home & even cooked supper for everyone! 

It was just such a good day.

You ever have those days when there is just one song that comes on that sticks out?
Well today for me that song was "Keep Your Head Up" by Andy Grammer.
(btw, if you haven't checked out his music, do it!)
So I'll leave you with that.


Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Dream a little dream...

So, in the past week and a half I've had some random, off-the-wall dreams.
I'm one of those weirdos that believes that dreams can and sometimes do genuinely mean something.
Or teach you something.
Make you aware of something you make not be aware of.
Or just help you understand something.
I believe that sometimes we may understand or realize more than we think we do & sometimes our dreams are the only way we can tap into that.
And then of course I know that there are those that are just your imagination, or the finishing of a thought you had, non-meaningful dreams.

Last night I the only thing I can remember was I was at a house & I remember seeing one of my Twitter friends that I met through Framing Hanley there. He was asleep most of the time though. I do remember he was awake at one point & we were just sitting there talking.
& Then I remember it jumping to me being in the car with my mother in law & I don't even remember what we were talking about, but we were talking about something.
I don't remember enough about that dream to take anything away from it.

The other night, I think Sunday night (?), I had a dream that Doug & I were supposed to go to Vegas with one of my favorites bloggers & her boyfriend. We were supposed to fly out. All I can remember is procrastinating when it came to packing.
Then, of course it came down to the wire & I ended up rushing to pack and didn't have all I needed and I was frantic and panicking. Knowing we were going to miss our flight.
And then somehow or another, I'm assuming I was either leaving or going to a store to get things..I ended up walking down the road.
But not just a road, a highway.
I was walking with someone I knew, but I can't remember who.
Well, we were walking and I knew where I was, I recognized everything around me.
The weather was eerie, and the sky was very ominous.
Then all of a sudden it started to blacken & before I knew it, there was a tornado.
On the road.
Headed in our direction.
All I can remember was jumping into a deep ditch that I luckily was right beside.
...& that's it, that's all that's coming to me. I guess I woke up? Or maybe that's all my mind remembers...

The Friday before last (I'd be the 1st of March)
My dream was me, in a field. Something you'd see in typical, southern scenery.
Tall grass, pretty skies, slight breeze.
Just a gorgeous day.
I reach a point in the field where there was sort of a ravine, only it wasn't a deep one. Just a few feet deep.
In this ravine, we animals.
Wild animals, exotic animals.
I can remember seeing a baby koala. Some cats of various kinds. I remember seeing a laid back tiger. A small elephant.
And a couple of other animals that aren't coming to mind at the moment, it was a mixture. Almost as if I were at a zoo, only not enclosed and all the animals were intermingled-and not killing each other.
And then I remember looking, and seeing a lion looking right at me. Making eye contact, with a lion.
I was scared & felt intimidated.
I remembered calmly walking away at that point. Just as if I've seen and enjoyed the view, time to move to next.
As I continued this leisurely type walk through the field, I noticed I was being followed.
By a cat. A big one. But it wasn't that lion. I'm honestly still not 100% sure what it was.
But I thinking a leopard, only instead of it's normal colors, it had dark colors.
Like a black leopard (which is basically a Panther), only you still see it's markings, so it wasn't a Panther.
I digress.
So this big cat was following me, very slowly. Not necessarily in a threatening manner, I kind of saw it as curiosity.
Still feeling intimidated, I walked very very slightly faster- almost unnoticeable change of pace. The cat didn't. But it was still right there. Right behind me.
And then, it was right beside me.
I had either stopped, or slowed back to where our paces matched.
And then for whatever reason I can remember it bit me. Not enough to seriously injure, but enough to scare me, although I don't remember if it brought blood, I think it's might have just a little. It wasn't attacking me, but it had slightly latched onto my arm for a second. I broke free and continued walking away from it, and it following.
There was an old cabin. I decide to go to it.
I remember going inside, the cat following me. As I reached one area of the house I walked in a door & was able to somehow shut it after the leopard was in. I proceeded to walk our of another & shut the door behind myself, locking the cat in.
But it could still see me.
We stood there looking at each other.
It wasn't angry, it wasn't trying to escape.
It was just looking at me, and me at it.
Almost like looking in a mirror, how you just stand and stare.
And while it was all intimidating, I was calm. I almost felt a small sense of comfort.
I either started to walk again, or I just faded out of the dream.
And that's all I can remember.

I looked that one up. Various elements. And from what I've found so far, I take away a bit of positivity from it. But it still baffles me, what area of my life does it pertain to? All of it, or only one area? I still don't 100% understand it.
Writing it out almost gives me another view point of it. Another way to look at it, or look it up.
Same with my travel dream.

Dreams are crazy things!


So Sexual

Time to put on our big girl panties....or take them off
And let's talk a little bit about sex.
 Nicole wanted to try a sexy link up & today is the first day of it! 
Check out full details here.  
So let's do this.
This weeks question:
What place(s) or way can your significant other
touch you to get your engine going??
In the bedroom/at home: When he kisses my neck, around my ears or on my collarbone. A little biting/nibbling, too. Sometimes a massage is a good starter- I feel like that kind of sounds high maintenance, so I guess more specifically, my back. Rubbing or even just lightly dragging his fingertips across/ down my back (or the side/back of my neck) is wonderful! 
I'm also a boob girl; he can rub 'em, kiss 'em, whatever.. 
And my know what I'm talking about.. 
When he traces his fingers along that area or kisses...Oh man!
 Outside of the bedroom: Telling me his intentions or what he wants (I know that's not a touch, but still). Tracing along my ear or neck. Or rubbing my thigh, if we're sitting & no one can see it. And if he sneaks in a butt grab...not a middle school aged but grab, but a nice handful, discretely of course. No need for everyone to see that. ;)
And sometimes,  in both instances-both at or away from home-, all it takes is some passionate kissing.
Now it's your turn!
Take the question & answer any way you'd like to. As in depth, or not, as you'd like.
This is for fun, so have fun with it!
Don't forget to add your link to the link-up!  

Monday, March 11, 2013

Monday morning--er afternoon-- blahness & a new sexy time link-up!

Y'all, I am just not feeling this. Sucks to come away from such a good weekend to this. I just don't feel good...and it's not the time change.

Friday: I went shopping with my Mom & Granny for a Bridal Shower gift. Which was pretty much a one-stop-shop trip. But me, I can't do that. I had to walk next door to Michaels. Ughh...guys seriously, I'd love a chance at a Michaels (or Hobby Lobby) version of Supermarket Sweep. To just run through and grab any and everything I could! Anyway, every time I go to Michaels it leaves me feeling a little down because I really miss scrapbooking. I want an area to work in sooo bad! Ugh, but we ended our shopping trip by stopping by Mickey D's for a milkshake. Yum-O! Satisfied my chocolate milkshake craving. Then I headed to my cousins to hang and shoot the shit, gossip, the usual. We took a late night trip to Wally World & then I headed home to FINALLY eat supper (Pizza Rolls) at freaking 11pm since she didn't feed me like she said she would! lol

Saturday: Day of the Bridal Shower. I met up with my cousin again, the same one, at about 1. I was going to ride with her to the shower & we had to be there by 2. So we meet at the store & I'm switching the gifts from Hubby's car to hers while she's pumping gas & she gets a call from her Aunt -btw, my God Sister is her cousin, that's not confusing right ;) - about the shower, asking if she was coming. She basically says "yes, we're on our way"...well the shower starts at 4! FOUR! Not 2. Haha, well we decided to go early anyway. The only people there were her aunt, uncle & younger cousins. The bride-to-be finally showed up & then before we knew it so did everyone else. The shower went great, she got some great stuff & it was so good to see my God Sister! By the time my cuzzo & I left we had been there for like 4 hours. haha. She dropped my off at my mother in laws & I ate a burger left from the small cookout I missed & then watched some TV & then hubs & I headed home. When we got home I was in such a good mood & we were just acting silly. I love those times. We went to bed & I ate too much sugar. & Then we had a mini shoot with Sugar (not to be confused with the aforementioned candy).
Sunday: Was a lazy day. I sent Doug out the door at 3am with my brother, Gpa & another club member. They went to the hunting club to check the hog traps, feeders, and cameras & to do a few other things. Hell they made it back before I woke up, which means it was a quickkk trips because it's a 2 hour trip just going down, so..yea. He woke me up & then he went back to bed. So, I went to pick up some groceries with mom. Got home, woke him up, turned on the race & we all sat around. Then Doug went fishing with my bro & dad got supper started. We crunk up the grill last night & had baked potatoes & steaks & I prepped the salad. Supper was aaaaamazeballs!

And that was the end. Other than my middle of the night bath/shower.
I really wish I knew where my damn blow dryer disappeared to.

Anywho, my weekend was actually great. Just wish I didn't get up today feeling the way I do. I'm not sick, I just feel...bad. Hoping I shake it by the end of the day or tomorrow. I'm totally not doing anything I had planned to today & I'm slightly disappointed in myself, but I'll get over it.
This is a pro to being a stay at home wife, when I feel bad I can actually lounge around and not have too much to worry about.

Okay now that I rambled about that.
Onto this Sexy Time Link-Up!
My girl Nicole has decided to do a new link-up called 'Naughty Talk Tuesday with Grub N Marriage' talking about Sex.
She will post a question about your sex life & you answer accordingly! Tomorrow is the first one & I hope you ladies will at least check it out & give it a try! :) Check out her blog for the first question & answer it & link up tomorrow!

And that's about all I have for you today. Thinking about losing myself in my DVR & Pinterest all day. (OH & The Client List is back on! YAY! I had to DVR it so I haven't watched it yet, but I'm excited. Love that show & love J.Love!)

Love Always

Saturday, March 9, 2013

The "I will" Post

Good morning, everyone!
Sitting here eating my breakfast, trying to get going on this gorgeous Saturday.
Mt. Dew Kickstart to Kickstart my day! WOO!
It's be sooo pretty the past couple of days, I was actually able to enjoy a chocolate milkshake yesterday and not be freezing afterwards! I'm just that much more excited for Spring to get here! NOW!
I'm ready for slush puppy weather!
I've got a bridle shower that I need to get ready for, so I can't linger.
I could have swore I posted this yesterday, but obviously not.
So today it is!

I've been a bit down in the dumps lately & I have tried & tried to put on a happy facade, but there have been so many things on my mind that I can't quite shake them.
So, I decided on some distractions. Goals. Some small, short term goals.
I will either finish my current book, or decide to come back to it later, so I can read The Happiness Project.
I vow to pick at least 2 (starting small) Pinterest projects, and actually DO them
I will make a decision on the camera I want, & if I should chose the one I can actually afford...
I will buy it.
I am going to start exercising, even if it's just a little right now...but first I'm gonna sit down one day & add all of the food I commonly eat to my MFP so it's easier to enter.
I will pick at least one exercise or routine off of my pinterest board and try it out.
I need a full length mirror. I've gone without one too long now. So, I'm gonna work on getting a new one. 
I will get out of the house a little more.
I will stop putting off working in the basement aka "my apartment".
I want to plan a vacation. Even if I'm not going to actually take it anytime soon.
I want to plan some stuff with my hubby love, even if it's just a couple of date nights.
I will make my dad's Father of the Groom Gift that I was supposed to complete and give to him as his Father of the Groom gift. Almost 2 years later & it's still just chillin' in my room. I suck, okay. But I'll make it his Father's Day present this year.

So, Thursday (I believe) one of my favorites, Stephanie over at Bourbon and Glitter, got nominated for a Liebster (rightfully so) & like a true rebel broke the rules & nominated everyone and anyone who wanted to answer the questions. So I figured, why not?!
Go check her out! She's awesome & has the sweetest little fur baby, Hawkeye. & She makes alcohol/cocktail cuppy cakes & shares her recipes!
Her ?'s
1.  what's your favorite vacation spot?
Down to FL to see my best friend. And even though I've only been like twice, I love Gatlinburg/P. Forge (even though I haven't spent time in P. Forge...yet)

2.  favorite disney movie (if you tell me you don't like any disney movies, well, gtfo! liar!)
The Aristocats, Lilo & Stitch (I absolutely L-O-V-E Stitch), Alice In Wonderland, Peter Pan, Pocahontas, Beauty and the Beast, Snow White...Yea, you get the idea...pretty much ALL of them..that I've seen.

3.  tv show you could watch over and over and over?
Um,...Ridiculousness. Give me a show that makes me laugh & I am good. I could actually watch just about anything over and over...okay that's not entirely true. but still...

4.  what's your very favorite bar in your hometown or college town?
Ay yi yi...something you don't really hear a southerner say...I'm not much of a bar gal. Mainly because I become intolerant over overly drunk people very quickly, unless I'm watching them from afar...then it's entertainment. lol. So, I don't really have a favorite in my town.

5.  do you have a weird habit you do on a daily basis?
Honestly, I know I do...but I can't think of one.

6.  best gift you've ever received?
Uhh...Maybe any cameras I've ever received over the years? I don't know, that's a toughie.

7.  favorite store to shop at for clothes?  
Target, Rue 21, Old Navy, Kohls, Aeropostale, I like Pac Sun too

8.  website (not personal blog or social media) you check daily?
Everyone's blogs...Pinterest (even though that's kind of social media..) and...I don't know...Google? lol

9.  food you could never give up on a diet?
Pizza. Potatoes. Everything I eat....

10. alcoholic cupcake flavor you'd like to see from me in the future?  (yeah i went there)
I've never eaten any alcoholic cuppy cakes. ever. O.O So I'm honestly not sure.  Um, oh, it's not a cocktail, but, it being March, in the spirit of Saint Patrick's Day, maybe try something with Saint Brendan's Irish Cream Liqueur. Maybe chocolate & that? Or some kind of toffee...Or White Chocolate with either that infused or mixed into the icing. Hmm..

There ya go!
Hope everyone has a great day & weekend!